Catechism
by Hikaru R. Kudou
Summary: Shounen ai. A SanzoxGoku oneshot! The monk has questions. The monkey has the answers – kinda. A series of Q&A at night leads to an unexpected result… Do read the warning before the story, thank you!


**Title: **Catechism  
**Authoress: **Hikaru Risqué Kudou  
**Rating:** PG (A/N: Oh, when will shounen ai be rated G? Ack! Who hit me?)  
**Genre:** General, Romance, slight humour  
**Pairings: **Sanzo/Goku, Gojyo/Hakkai insinuations  
**Warnings: **Mild OOC, crappy plot, and profound quantity of sap  
**Summary: **The monk has questions. The monkey has the answers – kinda. A series of Q&A at night leads to an unexpected result…  
**DISCLAIMER:** I own only what are rightfully mine.

Authoress' Notes: …eh?  
Authoress' Muse's Notes: *rolls his eyes at her in reproach* Any similarity with any other fic out there is purely coincidental. And hope you enjoy the story until the end. Sit back and enjoy the ride.

-=-=-=-=-=-

            Sanzo grumbled to himself as he opened the door to Goku's room. The latter, upon hearing the sound, craned his neck to see who had entered.

            "Sanzo?" Goku was surprised. "What are you doing here? Where's Gojyo?"

            Snorting coldly, Sanzo sat on a chair and treated himself to a cigarette. "That cockroach is in my room."

            "Eh?"

            "With Hakkai."

            "Eh?? Whatever for?"

            Deciding that Goku should not know lest the knowledge of it pollutes his innocence so (Gojyo's middle name _is _horny – a name he truly deserved by means which even Sanzo would not dare to venture into), "How should I know?"

            "I thought I was supposed to be sharing a room with Gojyo…Does that mean you're sleeping here tonight?" asked Goku, a twinkle of delight in his golden eyes.

            Sanzo glanced at him for a split second. "Against my wishes." Denying, however, would not do him any good.

            "Ah! Okay!" Goku, who was on the bed, moved away to provide enough space for Sanzo so that he could sleep on the queen-sized bed. Next to him.

            Sanzo eyed the space for a good five minutes, until his purple eyes stared at Goku. Subsequently, his thoughts returned to his cigarette.

            He could, he knew, have just shot the door of his room down and haul Gojyo back to where he rightfully belonged, dumping him back in this room which he and Goku were supposed to be sharing. Nonetheless, the act would, for one thing, bring an undesirable consequence in Hakkai's behaviour should he sees his lover being a victim of maltreatment, resulting in Hakkai sneaking out of the room in the middle of the night, meeting Gojyo in some anonymous rendezvous spot, and waking up late the following morning. End result, they would get a sleepy driver behind the wheel.

            Technically, it never happened before, but Sanzo was not taking any chances especially with him in the front seat, a spot more prone and vulnerable to danger should an accident take place. Therefore, for the sake of his safety (and Goku's, a tiny voice hissed in his ear), he would rather have a wide-awake driver. As a bonus for his deed of allowing the redhead a night together with his dear lover, Sanzo would spend the night with Goku. In Gojyo's place.

            By then he knew all Sanzo/Goku fans were throwing colourful confetti around and celebrating joyously after knowing his decision.

            He decided he should make his move on that very night. His impatience was killing him to no end, and he was sickeningly jealous of seeing Gojyo and Hakkai whispering lovey-dovey words towards each other. No, he wouldn't, of course, go to that extent since the act was un-Sanzo-like, but the point was…

            …He wanted Goku.

            Only, Goku did not seem to be cognisant of this. Yet. It was Sanzo's strong belief that Son Goku's first love was food, and he was determined to change that. But first, he had to find out if he had the chance to do so. He was, one must not forget, fighting against food for Goku's love.

            "Oi, saru…"

            Goku perked up suddenly on the bed, attending to his master's call. "Yes, Sanzo?"

            Sanzo puffed in his trademark blasé manner. "Would you rather follow a bun vendor, or stay with me?"

            "Eh?" Goku goggled at the blond, clueless. He was somewhat taken back upon hearing the sudden question. "Why did you ask?"

            Sanzo wrinkled his forehead, depicting his thin patience. "Answer."

            "Well…" Goku gestured thoughtfully, until finally, he smiled. "That's easy!"

            Sanzo opened one eye, affixing it on the shorter lad. "Just answer, damn it. I didn't ask if it was easy or not."

            "I would stay with you!" Goku, brightening, answered as if it was the easiest question given to him.

            But Sanzo was far from satisfied. "Even if I can't buy buns anymore?"

            "Um!" Goku answered quickly, confident.

            "Even if I can't feed you anymore?"

            "Even if you can't feed me anymore! I can always catch fish for the two of us!" Goku offered. "I will feed you!"

            "If I don't feed you on purpose?"

            "Eh? You would do that?" Goku paused. "It's okay. Like I said, I can go fishing."

            "If I beat you every day?"

            "Mou, Sanzo! You **do** beat me every day! With your fan! But I'm still here!"

            "If I scold you?"

            "I don't mind, Sanzo. I just hope you don't overdo it…"

            "If I tell you to go to hell?"

            "Uh…I would ask you why, and after I know why, I'll go."

            '_Hmm…' _"If I want you to leave?"

            Goku did not answer straight away, but he gawked at the monk in silence. Goku's countenance was that of horror and sadness. "Do you want me to leave, Sanzo?"

            Sanzo did not have the heart to look at Goku. "I asked you first, saru."

            "Sanzo…" In a flash Goku was kneeling in front of him. "Sanzo, why are you asking me all this? You want me to go? Is that it? Sanzo?" There was a tinge of urgency in his voice, and made clear when he gripped Sanzo's robe. 

            Sanzo only sighed in mild annoyance. "No, ahou, it was just a question."

            "Really?"

            "Hm." Sanzo inhaled the smoke that was hovering around him. "Answer."

            "Then I…I would ask you why, and then I'll say no."

            Sanzo's hand ceased in mid-air. "Why?"

            "Because I don't want to! Is that wrong?"

            "Even if my life depends on it?"

            Goku was starting to get terrified, the first sign being his pallid cheeks. "That's—that's a different case."

            "Would you rather spend a night with me or Gojyo?"

            "You, of course! That cockroach drools in his sleep. Yuck…"

            "Me or Hakkai?"

            "Eh, Hakkai? I'll choose you. I don't want Gojyo pushing me off the bed to sleep next to Hakkai…"

            "Me or Kougaiji?"

            A sickly look passed Goku at the thought of spending a night with Kougaiji. "You."

            "Homura?"

            Horrified, "You."

            "What do you see me as?"

            "A sun!"

            "What if I don't want to be your sun?"

            "I'll let you be my moon!"

            "If I don't want to?"

            "My stars! But stars don't shine as bright as the sun…"

            "Other than that?"

            "My sky!"

            "What would you do if you see me dying in—Homura's clutches?" '_Ha! As if! Dream on, you freaky god!'_ He silently added, picturing himself telling the said war god off and giving him a piece of his mind. And a bullet from his gun. Scratch that, make that a dozen.

            "I'll tear his limbs apart!" There was fortitude written all over his face.

            "If you see me dying?"

            "I—I…" Goku could not find his voice. Muted, Goku looked hard at Sanzo, and tears rolled down his cheeks. "I don't want you to die…"

            Sanzo's brows furrowed, somewhere in his heart he was touched at the sight of Goku crying for him. "Why?"

            "Because…because I like having you with me. I don't want you to leave me alone. If you're gone, I'll be alone again." Goku spoke with considerable amount of difficulty, his heart torn to think of the day Sanzo decides to abandon him. "I don't want to be alone anymore. It's painful…"

            "Hakkai and Gojyo would still be around."

            "But they're different! They're not—they're not **you**."

            "Hakkai treats you well."

            "But Hakkai is not my sun!" As he spoke his grip tightened, his tears making spots on Sanzo's apparel. "And that cockroach—he'll just bully me some more."

            "Homura would take care of you." Sanzo mentally grimaced at the mere mention of him.

            "I don't want him to take care of me. I want your care."

            "Why?"

            "Because you've been doing so since—since forever! And I prefer you to take care of me! I don't want anyone else!"

            "Even if they do better than I do?"

            "Nobody is capable of doing better than you do, Sanzo."

            At last, Sanzo was contented with what he had the pleasure of witnessing. Before he could proceed, Goku had wrapped his arm around his waist. "G-Goku!?"

            "Sanzo! Are you dying? Are you sick? Is that why you're asking me all these questions?"

            Sanzo could feel his robe was starting to get wet from the excessive flood resulted from Goku's tears. "Baka…"

            "You can't be sick! You look as healthy as ever, Sanzo! Why didn't you tell me?"

            A slight smile found its way to Sanzo's lips. He was slightly amused seeing this outburst on Goku's part.

            "There must be a cure for this disease you're having, Sanzo! I'll find it for you, no matter what! Sanzo, I don't want you to die…" Goku sobbed deeper into Sanzo's stomach, rendering them both somewhat suffocated.

            Sanzo, not wanting him to waste his tears any further, gently pushed Goku's head away in an attempt to prevent him from drilling a hole into his already lean abdomen. Sanzo clasped both of his steady hands on each side of Goku's head, making the latter face straight at him. Goku's tears were swelling his eyes, his lips trembling, and his face was redder than Gojyo's hair.

            "I don't want you to go…" Goku whispered between sobs.

            "Why?"

            "I—I…" Goku threw his arms around Sanzo's neck like a child, and cried further.

            "There is only one cure…"

            Goku pulled away, his expression lightened up like a Christmas tree. "Really? Yokatta! Where can we find it?"

            "…It's with you."

            Goku froze, only his tears continued to drip from his chin. "I—I have the cure? What is it? Is it—" Goku clutched Sanzo's hand. "Do you need my blood? My heart?"

            Sanzo blinked once as his brain endeavoured to process what his companion had just uttered.

            "Whatever it is, I'll give it to you! Including my soul—anything, as long as you can stay alive!" Goku brought Sanzo's hand to his heart. "Take my heart, if that's what you need to keep being alive."

            Sanzo felt Goku's heart pumping in his hand, and Goku's hold on him got tighter. "Are you sure?"

            Pursing his lips, trying to stop the continuing flow of tears, Goku nodded weakly. "Take it."

            In one swift movement, Sanzo's lips had grazed on Goku's before finally overpowering them completely. His free hand held Goku's back to make him stay in place, supporting him and giving him a feeling of security, whilst his hand that was on Goku's heart stayed still, a motion portraying his willpower of staying with his decision in making Goku rightfully his.

            To say that Goku was shocked would have been a gross understatement. Goku had never been attacked in that manner before, and he was uncertain on how he should react. In the end he succumbed submissively to Sanzo, permitting him to fully dominate the historical epoch. Sanzo, it seemed, knew exactly what he was doing. Perhaps, better than Gojyo with his own—performance.

            Sanzo broke the kiss rather reluctantly, noticing that Goku was panting, catching his breath. As Goku gasped, collecting precious oxygen to ensure his survival, Sanzo cleared the messy bangs on Goku's forehead, in the process wiping his sweat away.

            "Are you cured now, Sanzo?" asked Goku, hopeful. "You didn't take my heart…"

            "Idiot, you took mine."

            "WHAT?" Goku's hands stole over Sanzo's chest, searching for a heartbeat. "Sanzo, you can't live without a heart! I swear, I didn't steal your heart! Maybe Homura did! I wouldn't dream of doing such a thing! I don't want you to die!"

            And Sanzo was beginning to get peeved, not too peeved though since the naivety of Goku's was too adorable, wiping away any trace of unnecessary anger in Sanzo, entombing it in for the time being. Homura stealing his heart? Ha! The idea alone was sufficient to send him laughing maniacally to the nearest mental institution! He held Goku's prying hands tightly, trying to make him listen. "Are you **that** dense?"

            "I know I'm stupid, but—"

            "I am courting you, you idiot!" demanded Sanzo, irate to see his wooing was horribly going downhill and undignified, what with Goku responding with the clumsiest of answers, reflecting his childlike acumen. "I am sick because of you!"

            "Me? What disease did I bring on you?"

            "It is this mushy feeling people call love." Sanzo felt quite embarrassed to have alluded the most emotional word he thought would never cross his mind. Ever. But was he wrong.

            "Love? You mean—the same feeling Gojyo and Hakkai has for each other?"

            "Hm."

            Goku was awed beyond words. "That means you don't hate me? At all?"

            "No, I don't."

            "So why did you ask me all that questions?"

            "Because I want to know whether you are currently in love with your godforsaken buns or not," said the monk dryly.

            "And? Am I?"

            Sanzo's visage was grave. "No. Or else I would be on a crusade to annihilate all buns and bun-vendors."

            Goku chuckled. "Sanzo, you just cracked a joke!"

            "Whatever." For some reason, Sanzo had a feeling that some people out there enjoy seeing him dropping his icy-cold front towards Goku… "I'm sleeping here tonight. Any objection?" His tone was authoritative, insinuating that he would only take one reply to that – a negative one.

            "Not at all!" Tugging his sinewy arm, Goku dragged Sanzo toward the bed excitedly as soon as Sanzo had discarded his cigarette. "I want you to accompany me tonight! And every other night too!" Goku obediently pulled a blanket over Sanzo's body, making sure he was warm, preventing him from really falling sick.

            "Hey, saru..."

            Not waiting for him to complete asking, Goku smiled in genuine happiness with the exact idea of what Sanzo wanted to know, answering in the most confident tone that night, "Yes, Sanzo, I love you too. A lot. Forever." He snuggled closer to the taller man. "Um, Sanzo, I have one more question…"

            "What is it?" said Sanzo, slightly petulant. He was tired of all the talking. He could not remember the last time he opened his mouth to talk that much…and really, his facial muscles were getting a tad cramped.

            "What should I say if Gojyo asks me what happened between us tonight?"

            Sanzo leaned over Goku, and brushed Goku's hair away from his eyes. "Tell him to ask me."

            "And then?"

            "My gun will answer to him. Now, no more questions until we're done…" Sanzo effectively silenced Goku, much to the latter's enchantment. With that, over were the Q&A sessions, making way for another more active form.

            (Needless to say, elsewhere, a multitude of avid Sanzo/Goku fangirls and supporters threw a gigantic celebration party, which lasted for three consecutive nights.)

- - - - - [owari desu] - - - - -

Authoress' Nonsense: No, I don't think I made Sanzo OOC. He's human too, so I think he can be a romantic towards Goku. Hope you enjoyed the story, and thank you for reading! *bows*


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